Bittersweet Home

It has been a month since I left Chennai (the greatest city on Earth) for a job in Gurgaon (read Gud-gawn) and the city has already put me through a whirlwind of emotions. Being a spoilt Chennai vaasi the distinct flavor of the North was appalling at first. The common man’s bladder sets off at the sight of a wall. The lack of color is made up for by the salivary coat of paan and tobacco. I do not deny the existence of such artists in the South but I haven’t seen as many. If you have travelled in a share auto you’d imagine that, logically, the maximum allowed capacity of the vehicle is 8.But I have had the opportunity, misfortune rather, of travelling with 15 other co-passengers! The guy who smokes his beedi no matter who is around, the woman who has three children and is barely in her twenties and the ‘chick’ who sits on your lap are regulars in the auto. Traffic rules have been done away with and the roads have descended into complete anarchy. Road accidents and the fights ensuing them are a common sight. Pollution levels are so high that a stroll on the street will result in the deposition of a thick black layer of dirt on your clothing. These glaring imperfections irked me for over a week and I was sinking deep into a state of depression.

And one evening when I was hunting for paying guest accommodations (which was, back then, a part of my routine) my entire perspective about moving to this crazy city changed. An old couple, who ran the paying guest accommodation which I wanted to enquire about, coaxed me into having dinner with them without asking if I was going to move in or if I was even interested !All this because, I’m far away from home! I knew for a fact that they were not feigning to lure me into taking up their accommodation, because they are very well to-do. Due to other circumstances we couldn’t move into their place but that meal opened my eyes to the fact that no matter how disparate North India and South India are the undeniable truth is that we are all part of one large country with common traditional values. All the time when I was cribbing about how wonderful Chennai was and how different Gurgaon is from Chennai I had been overlooking the fact that we as people are the same. We have always welcomed our guests with open arms. (We overdo it by extending the hospitality to terrorists and refugees but that is a different story) I realized that people define cities and not its infrastructure. Of course there are a few people here who are unpleasant but practicality suggests that it is better to be grateful for the good and ignore the rest.

So, the city now seems to be a lot cleaner. The share autos are not crowded; the way I see it, they’re running at ‘optimum’ capacity to save fuel for our future generations! And everyday I have pointless conversations with total strangers because I’ve learnt that people here love to talk and are totally uninhibited, which I personally love.

There is always home away from home. We just have to look for it.

And I bid thee adieu my love....

I love her. She is the most amazing thing on Earth. Her peace,calm and quiet will never cease to amaze me. During times of crisis and waves of distress she rests. I can't hug her. Yet somehow i feel her warmth.She is a work of nature, painted with the colors of time. She has moulded herself over the years to suit changing times. Yet there is something about her that is unvarying. She treats her guests with nothing but kindness and love.They end up becoming her own.

She is a body of knowledge.She taught me all that i know.She has given me all that i have. The bond we share is so deep that separation doesn't hurt. For I, shall carry her with me wherever i go. And I know deep inside that she will be waiting for me.

I can smell her scent right now.I can't tell her i am leaving.She won't understand.She can't understand.A love affair of 21 years which will last a lifetime.My city.My Chennai.My love.I bid thee adieu.

If

This poem is perhaps the best that i've ever read. The words are so simple,yet they convey a lifetime's worth knowledge.

If

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream–and not make dreams your master,
If you can think–and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ‘em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings–nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And–which is more–you’ll be a Man, my son!

–Rudyard Kipling

Lol

This is an excerpt from a telephonic conversation between two of my close friends which i later came to know .

Romeo: Machan life eh confusing ah irku..

Thala: Yen macha? (as if he cared)

Romeo: Anjala enna wuttu pogitta macha

Thala: yaaru un girl friend ah?

Romeo: aman macha

Thala: aiyaiyo!

Romeo: Enna machan

Thala: unaku thani kooda adikka theiryaathe enna macha panra?

Romeo: ...

Article 49-0 and Why you shouldn't consider it

In the past three days i have received close to ten e-mails about the Article 49-0 of the Indian constitution. According to the article a person can go to a polling booth and 'vote for nobody'!
A person can get his finger marked and convey to the presiding election officer that he/she is not voting for any of the candidates. The significance of the number of '49-0' votes is that if a candidate wins in a ward by, say 100 votes , the polling will be considered valid only if this number is greater than the number of '49-0' votes. In the event of the number of '49-0' votes exceeding the winning margin there shall be a re-poll.

This is definitely a better option when compared to not voting at all. Instead of some random party worker impersonating you and casting your vote, it is better that you openly declare your disinterest in all the candidates.However there is a flip side to it.

In a multi-party democracy where a hung parliament is very likely , especially this time around, the idea of a '49-0' vote should not be encouraged. A responsible voter should ,in my opinion, keep in mind that an unstable government is a huge threat to the country.Elections are an expensive affair and a lot of money goes into it. An indecisive electorate will greatly hamper economic progress and result in a slow-down.

Ideally one should vote for the most able candidate.If all the candidates in a constituency are inefficient in the voter's opinion it is better to vote for the party/alliance which can form a stable government at the center rather than refraining from voting or fueling uncertainty.

Un Question de perspective

Watching the trees pass by,feeling the scorching sun and inhaling the smoke spewed by buses along the OMR a strange feeling engulfed me.My journeys back home from SSN will soon end.Nostalgia is a word that i am not particularly fond of.It takes away the beauty of the present and lets it slip-by. But there is a part of me that reminisces about those days of innocence, when i stepped into college without a clue about what was in store for me or what was beyond it.My first two years in college lacked direction and purpose. The college provided me with endless opportunities to have fun and i took all of them.Those were times when the earth spun faster and i was stuck in a moment. I was in awe with everything that surrounded me. I found my peers fascinating. There was more to learn from them than my professors. I was born again.

But somewhere down the line i realized that there is life beyond college and it was time to wake up from the deep sleep that my college had put me into.A vision of what i ought to be doing few years down the line was at the heart of everything i did. A sense of responsibility slowly crept into my system.I grew.

But due to a very questionable effort towards reaching what i set out for, I crashed and burnt.I died.My vision remains a hazy dream. And just like how an infant cries at separation from the warmth of its mother the thought of leaving college scared me a little bit.The heart cherished the familiarity while the mind questioned it. I was not in the place where i thought i 'd be and i didn't have the slightest clue as to where i would be in a few months from now.A part of me questioned my judgment and perhaps the vision itself.

The secret behind success is to see opportunity in times of adversity. My predicament unnerved me for a while before i realised that it was after all a question of perspective. I can either choose to be the infant or the man who sees possibility and is excited by it. The world is filled with opportunities and in every opportunity there are several possibilities.All of which is waiting to be explored!

From inglorious semester results to unlimited classroom fun and wonderful people,life in college had everything.I have learnt more about myself than engineering itself . The best is yet to come and life in SSN has only made me wiser by experience.

It is definitely the end of a chapter.But it has opened up an entirely new one.

Born again.Waiting to grow up.

Happy New What?!

January 1, 2009

Last night i was out on the streets trying to discover what New Year celebrations are all about and why people do it.I have never 'celebrated' a New Year before.In my understanding New Year's eve was nothing more than a reason for guys to make use of open bars and 'couples only' parties to have fun.And for those with stiff budgets it simply was a time to get drunk,run around streets and get away with it.But i wasn't convinced.So i decided to just get along with the crowd hoot,yell and feel the 'spirit'.The plan was to experience the fun which i knew existed but have never understood or experienced.Instead i came back home with a deeper understanding about the world and myself.

The beach is one of those places where people throng on New Year's eve to celebrate.I went there by around 8:30 pm and met up with a classmate who had come there with a couple of his friends.And in a matter of 20 minutes i was a part of a gang of about 15 people.I am unable to recollect their names but they were a merry group.I did feel left out because i wasn't acquainted with any of them but they certainly were having the time of their lives.A closer look at the group and i realized that just like ordinary men these guys had dreams,desires and an element of dissatisfaction with life.But they were out to forget about all that they don't have and live the moment.It was the usual chit chat that you would observe in any group.But the idea was eminent.They were out to Live The Night.

I then met up with my best friend and the night began for us.He seemed to have a certain understanding of these celebrations.So we stuck together and kept roaming. We bought a bottle of Coca Cola and carried it with us sipping on it occasionally only to attract attention from passers by.It was only later that we understood that all of them had mistaken the bottle of Coke for alcohol and i guess it is expected out of 21 year olds.It reminded me about the inherent nature of the society to judge and stereotype people.From special children to homosexuals our perceptions are all skewed.We associate behavior with people rather than the other way around.Perhaps this is something people can ponder about on New Year's day!


At about an hour to midnight another group of friends joined us and now we were a gang.And as the night grew old people slowly started to loose their sanity.It was a combination of the New Year spirit from within and the New Year spirit which went in.The tiniest gimmick attracted a lot of attention which in turn spurred them.I guess the attention made them feel like performers and they revelled in their glory.And slowly all the groups wanting a share of the attention started to indulge.The end result was a huge crowd of people partying on the street with absolutely no bother.

I felt like i was watching a foreign language film without subtitles.But i knew that when the clock strikes 12:00 something special was going to happen.And it did happen.A strange emotion took over me.I had created a memory.A memory that all the guys with whom i spent last night will carry with them for a long time.Being a final year student in college i don't have the slightest idea as to where life is taking me.But at that moment, when i wished my friends a Happy New Year I wasn't thinking about why people around me were behaving the way they were i wasn't pondering over where i'd be by the end of 2009 all i knew was that i was standing on top of a parapet 7 feet above the ground hugging my friend wishing him luck with all my heart.This gesture was followed by mock Kung Fu duel and a huddle which strangers whose faces i can barely recollect joined.I too lost my senses because I had found what i was out to find.

Celebrations are about having people about around you to create memories which you can reflect on with a good feeling. Its not about how when where or why you celebrate.Its the happiness that matters.Everyday of the year is worth celebrating with the same zest.Eventhough it is impossible to do so memories are worth creating.It is worth doing something for atleast 2 mins a day which is worth remembering a lifetime.And it doesn't matter if we don't end up remembering them it is the intention that matters.

Its a beautiful day,don't let it get away....

U2